The Bad Memory

Last Sunday, April 12, 2009, I hanged out at the Octagon. I was not safe there but I still poured my boredom at the Cento. I had seen Pau, wearing black fit shirt and pants. He called me so stayed long at the Emilio Tible's monument.

"Where have you been?" asked he.

"Anywhere," I answered.

"May I have your contact number?"

"Which?" I laughed, "I have so many numbers." Then, I save one of my numbers in his phone with my name.

After an hour, two girls came over. One, introduced herself as Jean, sit beside me; while the other was sitting beside her. They were friends, I thought.

They came to know me. I like Jelly, the other girl, but Jean, kept on chasing at me. So, what I did was, I just took the risk just to make sure they would not go and I could still saw Jelly, her friends.

But, she was taken by someone I knew as Puti. I lose my inhibition. I could not get into this sticky girl. So, I leaved telling them I would only look for my friends who were waiting for me at the park.

When I got back to the place where they stayed, they were gone. They went home. "Thanks."

I thought, my neuron-cavity was kept on sensing for alcohol. And so, I sit near the bridge.

I had seen Pau and Mitch. I gestured my hand, "I'm here."

They called me up and told me to jam with them. After a while, another gay arrived riding in a padyak. He was new to me. We rode again in the padyak telling me that we would go to Hinulid.

When we were only at a distance, our vehicle stopped since they had found out that Andoy, a gay also, was at the store where their boys were standing along the road. We walked back to Centro. I had seen Alex and his boyfriend.

We went to the videoke bar owned by Magtanong who was living in our Barangay.

We had drunk there. They sung. The only thing I hated most was when Pablo kept on introducing me to other gays that I was his 'jowa'. And so, I secretly signed, 'No, I'm not."

When we were at the bar, I was sitting in front of Mateet, the gay whom I had known for the first time. He was the financer of these drinking trips. So, he was ''rich".

When we finished the bottle of matador, we moved to the other bar, Pando. It was not actually a bar, it was just a store where you would buy drinks and they would provide you the table, chairs and other things for drinking.

It happened to be that I sit beside him. So, we spent the chance. We were holding our hands and hugged secretly, not letting Pablo knew what we were doing while he was busy chatting to other gays.

When we were already done, I run away with Mateet. I knew, Pablo was very angry with me that time, but I did not have a choice, I like this gay, Mateet.

We had such rumors in the market. In the old and abandoned building wherein the moon was the sole witness which lighted up my naked body. I had experienced with him something knew which other gays had not yet done to me. I was like bathing with saliva. He was very expert. "Yuck!"

We were talking to each other while having sex which I never did before. We talked about everything regarding our lives.

"You're so delicious," he said.

I responded with a smile.

"Can I have you?"

"Why not?"

He would go to Manila the next day while I would go back to Libmanan. However, I told him, I would go to Manila.

"What time will you leave?"

"Before noon," I answered.

"I will pay for your booking."

"Ah, e, no need," Then, added, "ah, ok, if we will be there at the terminal at the same time."

"Meet me at the Lariz, we will eat there. Don't worry; I will be the one to pay for everything."